Wednesday, October 17, 2007

He's HOME!!!

Drew arrived yesterday safe and sound. Drew's dad, my family and my uncle and his family all showed up to surprise him at the armory when the buses came in. It's funny that this time home (as opposed to the 2 week leave he had in March) feels so much more freeing. It's so nice to know he won't have to leave this time, and that he is home where he belongs. Thanks for all of the prayers and support-- we could not have gone through this year without you!

Friday, October 5, 2007

Reflection on the past year

"And my God shall supply all your needs, according to His riches in glory in Jesus Christ"
Philippians 4:19

Over the past couple of weeks, countless people have come up to me wide eyed with excitement over the impending homecoming of the love of my life. The most common phrase I hear is "I just don't know how you do it," or "I would never be able to do what you do." Honestly, this situation from the outside looking in looks a lot worse than what it actually is like to go through. But as I look at the other marriages that have been put through the fire of a military deployment, I am faced with the grave truth that close to half usually don't make it through, or they have made it through, but will crumble soon after. It's a sad reality that I wish could be healed in some capacity. This truth alone made me reflect on my answer I have been giving all year. How selfish am I, to take the credit for making it through this year? It is HARD. The verse in Philippians has really struck a cord with me as I have reflected on all of this. God has given me strength to make it through this... when I don't feel like I can go much further, He picks me up. His hand has most definitely been upon both Drew and I in this trial. It is HE that has given me what I need to make it through. It is HIS hand that has picked me up when I have fallen. It is HE, and HE alone who has taken the burden from my weary shoulders. So yes, this deployment hasn't been as bad as I thought it would be, but my God has been greater than what my mind would fathom He would be. Isn't it great that we serve a God who works exceedingly greater than we could ever ask?

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Such is life.

Do you ever feel like your life is a roller coaster of emotions? I mean really, one day you wake up completely elated for no reason other than simply breathing, and then next day you wish you could quit breathing. Now, don't go get all scared and think I am suicidal, cause I am not. It's just that sometimes I wish my life would plateau in a sense that I would be able to maneuver through it without getting queasy with emotions. I am sure that is clear as mud. Let me explain.

I am on the downhill countdown for my husband to be home. Complete elation. Utter joy. I will be whole again (yes, I know it sounds corny, but I feel as though this year was only lived 1/2 way with Drew being gone.) Oh wait? That means getting used to being responsible not just for myself but for another human being. Feelings of inadequacy all over again (imagine being married, being separated, and then being married again. It's like the whole newly married phenomenon over and over again. You are so excited, but you don't really know if you can handle all of the responsibility that comes with the new territory. I know. It makes me dizzy too). I am completely, completely excited that Drew is coming home. But I am also fearful of my flesh, because I know I am selfish by nature, and I don't want that to ruin the excitement of the moment.

I have the best, I mean the best, family in the world. Don't argue. I know your family. Mine is better :) OK, maybe not. But let me live in my world of oblivion just for a moment. I have been able to get to know my younger siblings (who are just enough younger than me to be in a completely different stage of life at all times through this life) this year better than I ever thought I would. My siblings are my favoritist people in the whole world. They make me laugh till I cry, they say the greatest things in the world, they understand me like no one else does, they're just awesome. And now, they are moving. Brick in face. That's how I feel. How do you get up from such a hard blow? The past couple of days has me searching for steady ground like someone getting punched in a dark room. You don't really know where to grasp, but you know there is solid ground somewhere if you could only find it. Yes, I know that I serve a BIG God and He has plans that are far greater than our own. But I hardly feel like this is a good thing right now. Maybe in a few weeks. But now, it just sucks.

So, I sit, mad at myself for not having the faith of a child. Confused with all of the emotions surrounding my circumstances right now, and trying my best to lean on the Rock of the Ages. I'll come around. It may just take a while.

For the few of you who check this blog, I have now officially circled the band wagons and joined facebook. Apparently it's the new addiction, right up there with drugs and alcohol. Well, maybe not that bad. But seriously. check it out.

Monday, March 12, 2007

Family Vacation 2006

OK, so on the recommendations of my sister Laura, I am changing my profile picture. Laura said that it wasn't a good pic of me and Drew because we are wearing glasses. I don't know how to JUST post a pic to the profile, so I am putting some family vacation pics up so I can choose from those. Ta ta for now...

Saturday, March 3, 2007

So... I've caved in...

So, I started a blog. Some could say I've given in to peer pressure, while others could say I am finally catching up with my generation of web posters and blog connoisseurs. You may choose either and I shall not be offended. I have struggled with setting up a blog for 2 reasons: It can be seen and can become an invasion of privacy if you forget that you are posting for the world to see, and, I don't know if I have the discipline and time to actually post interesting information for all of you blog stalkers (I know you're out there-- I used to be one of them!). So I guess that now that I have thrown those 2 reasons out of the window, I will leave you with a picture of my beloved Toby. Toby is a Cairn Terrier and (IMO) the best dog in the world.

Monday, January 1, 2007

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